Ok, now that the business of making some sort of announcement is out of the way, now comes the thank you! My angelic boyfriend, hereinafter referred to as “Sweet Donnie” set all this up for me, making me a very happy lady. THANK YOU!

On with the show. What a strange and semi-stressful day. I went with the boys I work with up to some land where we hike and do other outdoor activities. My usual staff people were not with me, rendering routine somewhat pointless. These are kids that freak out if you move a picture on the wall. Switching staff members around on them is a equivalent of a 5 earthquake on the Richter Scale. Some of them just hide under a doorway, (or the psychological equivalent), the others loot everything in sight, (chiefly each other’s personal space), and the others yell, scream, and pout, in the hopes that if they express enough discontent with the world that the world will just knock it off already.

When I came back, there was a new therapist in some state of semi-crisis asking me lots of things and wanting to vent lots of things. But he mumbles. I mean REALLY mumbles. He talks through his teeth, and doesn’t open his mouth all the way. Picture the Joker’s mouth. Now imagine that the sides are sewn shut, and only the middle part of the mouth actually moves. And that part only moves as much as your own mouth would move if you were practicing ventriloquism. The guy speaks in hushed tones as though a closed door after the kids are gone is not enough confidentiality. ELVES might be listening. Or at least that’s what I thought in my head.

And then I left. I accomplished none of my paperwork, as per usual, which is sad, because I LIKE writing things down. I ran away to my house and had a bath, and then had a weird conversation with my mother. Two hours before this conversation, she was fine. Absolutely fine. But when she called, she was practically having a panic attack about all the things she can’t control. Which made me feel sad for her. So we moved out of sad territory into mad territory, which should enable her to get things done, like the 400 or so invoices she has let pile up, the packing of her universe to go back to Texas, and the acquisition of flea collars for her dogs, as there are apparently fleas everywhere in Texas. Who knew?

So I arrived at Sweet Donnie’s house in foul temper, carrying a large bag of ice, and probably looking semi-crazed, as I was at the point in her rant where she was telling me how inadequate and fat I am. (I am 5′6″ and 140). I am not exactly fat. But I am no longer a walking clothes hanger either. Regardless, this is no way for a mother to behave. I am very grateful to my sweet seestor Kristi for taking a bullet for the whole family and accompanying her on the dreadful drive to Texas. At least she can fly back in peace.

I have now finished a lovely daquiri that Donnie made me. My head is empty of unpleasantries I cannot control. Now I will deal with unpleasantries I can control by watching MST3K.